From a publication published on

Today, the world mourns the tragic assassination of Sir Hercule Satan, who was not only a decorated martial arts master, but was also an accomplished altruist with a gentle nature Monday afternoon, Sir Satan was on his way to an awards ceremony (just weeks after being knighted by the queen of England for protecting the fate of Earth through his victory in the Cell Games) when he was murdered while acknowledging a swarm of admirers in a crowded downtown East Shore, NE boulevard

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